Worry

It’s garbage day, but the truck didn’t wake me up this morning. A car alarm went off at 3:30 am. With anxiety being what it is these days, sleep isn’t always what it used to be. 

I can worry. It’s easy to worry about the well being of myself, the small beings who depend on me, or my immediate family. It’s easy to worry about my friends, family and neighbors. It’s easy to worry about strangers and all of the people in the world. Worrying is easy.

What takes some work is not worrying. You guessed it, I’m throwing away worry this week. Under less extreme circumstances, a little bit of worry isn’t necessarily a bad thing. We can worry a little bit and still get on with things.

Under these extreme circumstances, however, worry can spiral into so much insanity. Without really trying, right now is filled with a high level of concern, to the point that it permeates everything else we experience. 

I’ve been focusing on today. I can’t worry about the future right now. 

What can I do to help today? What I can do right now is the complete thought. I don’t let my mind stray to the future, I don’t treat myself to a horror show of an emotional future landscape. 

I could be crippled just by thoughts of tomorrow. I could be dragged down by concerns of yesterday. Instead, I constantly choose to be present. Helping. Doing my best in each moment, I’m sad, scared and worried, so I send that all away so that I can stay here, helping. 

I don’t have the luxury of spiraling into anxiety. I don’t have time to worry. I only have time to help people, love my family, and pet my dog. Worry will have to wait, I’m busy with today. 

#ongarbageday